The day before Thanksgiving is one of the biggest travel days of the year, and nobody seems to enjoy getting on a plane anymore — at least not since we started paying those baggage fees, putting liquids in a baggie and getting intimate pat-downs at airport security. But it could be worse. Lets take a look at far poorer alternatives to getting on a plane.
Tales of heroic dolphin rescues date back to ancient Greece, when Arion, a poet in the 7th century B.C., was said to have been thrown overboard by pirates and then carried to safety by dolphins. Dolphins are legendary for their seemingly selfless acts of bravery — even Dick Van Dyke recently claimed he was rescued by a pack of the adorable sea creatures after he suffered a terrible surfing accident. But when you stop and think about it, dolphins are an incredibly inefficient means of travel. The ocean is cold and your hands will start to hurt once you get tired of grabbing onto their fins. Dolphins sometimes swim by jumping in little arcs, which would make for a very bumpy ride — and some water up your nose. Also, they smell like fish.
And what was Dick Van Dyke doing surfing, anyway?
In the West, ferries have something of an idiosyncratic, almost folksy image — the province of maritime folk who need to ford rivers or get their fancy Ferrari to some beachside getaway. But for most of the world, these slumbering vessels are merchants of death. On a reporting trip, your humble reporter was once warned that, if he even attempted to venture the river ways to parts of southern Bangladesh, he would never make it back. Ferry sinkings are tragically common in Asia — the Eastern equivalent of the ubiquitous and no less depressing bus plunge.